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Conscious Evolution
Soul Story: Fallen Angel
By Maurice Turmel

Once there was a young man named Phillip who considered himself to be a gallant and noble gentleman. He loved to attend gala events and to promote himself as a knowledgeable and important person. He fancied himself to be quite a ladies' man and a gentleman even though he had no noble lineage to speak of. He actually came from an impoverished background where he determined, at a very young age, to rise out of those meager circumstances and travel in the company of nobility.

Phillip had no idea at the time he began his excursions into high society that he was giving up his Soul. The values that sustained him and kept him grounded as a child were being set aside to meet his goal of circulating in society's upper strata. He found he had to cheat and lie, and misrepresent himself constantly, in order to gain acceptance and approval from those whom he so ardently admired. For their part, these members of the so-called "elite" had little interest in Phillip, only to the extent that he might be useful in some surreptitious fashion, or that he might provide some distracting amusement. More often though, he was considered a pest, a simple irritant who had gained some measure of notoriety that could occasionally be useful.

Phillip had no idea that he was held in such low regard. His vision of himself had his so-called status quite elevated. In his mind, he saw himself as well received by the nobility and as having achieved his goal of recognition and acceptance in this world of the elite where he aspired to reside.

One day, when Phillip was again trying to impress another group from the upper class, he came upon a woman who immediately captivated him and drew his attention. Phillip did not notice at the time, but at the very moment of this encounter, all about him had come to a standstill. The people he had been talking to were now frozen in time, while he, unaware, was fixated on this lovely creature who had just stepped up to him. While he stood there, transfixed, the woman looked him in the eye and began to speak.
"You, sir, are a thief. You are a scoundrel and ne'er-do-well. You do not belong in this society. And you do not merit the recognition that you are seeking from these people. You are simply a phony. Not because you were born into lesser circumstances, but because you misrepresent who you actually are. You are not true to your "Self." Therefore, you cannot be a noble person."

Phillip was dumbfounded. He could not speak. He could only stare in stunned silence. This woman saw right through him. Who was she to be so blunt? How did she happen to be here on this day? And why had she chosen to challenge him in front of these individuals he was again trying to impress?

The woman looked at him with an eerie smile. "Look closely at me, Phillip. Do you not recognize me? I AM YOUR SOUL! I am here to remind you of who you are. I have come to you today to disarm you and to alert you to the dangers of the path you have embarked upon. You are at great risk of losing your Self altogether. These external circumstances are not you. They are simply a distraction, a trick of mirrors designed to lead you astray. You have only one task in life and that is to find your True Self. There is no other purpose. You wander around this plane getting yourself into all kinds of trouble, believing that your purpose is here or there, believing that you need this or that, hoping to be so special as to be excluded from the normal fate of man."

"You are deluded, my friend. Does anybody really know you? Has anyone seen that deepest Self of yours that lies within? Have you looked inward lately to review your life and your place in it? Then you cannot be truly satisfied, no matter how hard you try, because you are living a lie. Where is your truth, Phillip? Is it in these games you play? Is it in these little deceptions you designed to help you gain access to these so-called noble realms? Where are your close ties? Who loves you, Phillip, other than me? Who indeed knows you well enough to love you? No, my friend, you have wandered down a blind alley, where there is no love and no salvation. In pursuing these goals you have in fact moved away from your "True Self." You are instead prisoner to some unmet need from your past and you are trying to fill it externally. You believe that these special people and their privileged circumstances have something to offer you that you need. Has this in fact happened? Has your gnawing inner desire been met by these outward pursuits?"

Phillip had to turn away and avert her eyes. He could no longer stare at this woman who had completely unmasked him. She posed so many questions that went straight to the core of his Being. She was challenging him. He felt undressed and awash in shame. He had indeed abandoned his "True Self."

"You are a fallen angel," she went on to say "and you have lost your way. Come with me now and let's see if we can restore your life to a healthier state. Forget everything you have taught yourself to this point, for you have deluded yourself with all manner of false beliefs. First of all, there is no outer world to speak of, other than what acts as a mirror to your inner experience. So who are you trying to impress? If you feel lost in the outer world it is because you are disconnected from your Self on the inside. Secondly, there is no other purpose to life than to learn about your inner Self as you interact with the world around you. External circumstances are there to cast light on this inner dwelling Self and help you restore it to its proper place, at the center of your being."

"This Self speaks directly to who you are. Everything around you is just window dressing, props for the great drama of life. How easily does one become blind to this? Not so long ago, when you were a child, you reveled in the glory and wonder of nature. Your Self was who you were then, plain and simple. As the outer world began to take up more of your energy and attention you lost sight of that primal reality. You soon began to pursue what you thought were worthy goals in the outer world and set your Self aside in the process. Now, here you are, alone, living in the circumstances that you most admired, trying to believe you are happy. Yet you have no companion with whom to share this so-called happiness. Your only lover is this illusion that you cling to and which requires daily reinforcement lest it crumble before your eyes, much as it did today when I confronted you. Do you see how fragile an illusion can be?"

"Your Self now, well that's another matter. Your Self is your inner light and is unshakable because it knows only one truth which is derived from the Eternal and your Divine center. It is from this special place, located at the core of your being, that you can truly say - I AM - and be accurate in the most fundamental sense."

"There you have it, my dear Phillip, your essential Self is here returned to you. Get to know who you truly are. You may go on with your illusion, if you wish, or, you may take this Self that is your Divine birthright and express it to the best of your ability. Know this now, and forever. There can be no substitute for the truth of whom you are, no distraction and no replacement. This Self is who you are and is your direct link to your Soul. Let me repeat that - the direct link to your sacred Soul. Do you understand me, my dear friend? Can you see how important this is? Then go forward and honor the True You at your core. You have no other task in this life. The time has come for you to get focused."

With those last words echoing in Phillip's head, the woman vanished, and he was left to ponder what had been said and what this meant for him. A call had been issued, a powerful but loving admonishment. Phillip had been challenged to awaken and be true. He knew it was up to him. He had two paths before him. One he knew well and had taken him to this crisis. Another now beckoned, suggesting other worldly experiences, opportunities to grow and discover more about his true Self. So what would Phillip do now if he wanted to ensure that all might be well in his world?

Soul Story

Conscious Evolution: Beyond Healing

The healing journey sits behind us now as we look to the horizon to see what's coming next. Many of us are standing on this hill right now, marching toward the future eager to see what comes up for us now. How exciting!

We are eager, but scared as well. The healing journey gave our life perspective and a set of references we could relate to. Books were passed around; workshops and seminars were attended; and journal writing was completed. We pursued all manner of inner explorations designed to bring healing to that wounded part within. We knew where we were then. That particular framework surrounded us and gave us comfort. But now we're standing at a new frontier, one that's not well charted, defined or laid out, one that leaves us trembling as we contemplate the next step.

Here we can reach back to myth once again. What did the hero or heroine do at this point in their journey? How did they serve their fellow man? What was the nature of their blossoming? What will be the nature of our own?

Myth teaches us that all eventualities are cyclical. After any one phase is completed there comes another, and then another, all succeeding each other in a well orchestrated sequence. Beginnings, middles and endings, all following each other as surely as the cycles of the moon, the turning of the planets and the movements of the stars; each remaining true to some guiding principle that never fails in its measured and predictable unfolding. What goes around comes around. What follows one, follows all.

Some would call it a utopia, but that's not really so. Utopia is the word we use for the illusory concept of perfection. Perfection does not exist in our world, only in our minds; hence, the illusions of utopia. The poise we are talking about is a stance toward life, one that sees us consciously aware of our driving Force, the God of Love within us. This beacon lights up our path and guides us forward from here.

After the healing journey there is truth. The truth that states "God is our Savior" and He leads the way from here on in. Oh we can dispute this if we wish. We can engage once again in endless philosophical arguments, but the truth is still the truth. God resides within; we are God and He will lead the way from this point on. It means we must surrender control, or more accurately, the illusion of control! If you are not on this page at this very moment then you've missed the beginning of this book. Conscious Evolution leads to God - end of story!

So what does it mean to be led by God? Does it mean we no longer have free will? Not at all! We are free to choose as always. But why would we choose a path that takes us away from God when being God is all there is, and it can't be stated any simpler than that. Does that mean that God's will is our will? Yes, of course! God, as individualized in you, has free will. He will choose to express Himself through you as you were created to be.

If you choose God, that is your God Self, then you move forward from that point as per your specific design. You will be attracted to and choose to move toward your particular area of specialization. Are you a mover and a shaker? Are you a healer or teacher? Are you a wanderer or creator? Are you a lover or gardener? What are you? What are you designed and created to do? What does your heart say? Be true to you and you will live in the Heart of the Lord forever! You must determine what you are now that you've accomplished your healing journey.

This is where the creative part of you becomes animated. This is where that Self you've been working hard to rescue is set loose and begins to explore more actively. This is where you, as hero / heroine, begin to uncover and express your path of service.

There are only a few such paths ultimately, but they do come in many fascinating variations; so we are spoiled with choice. Behind the curtain of our defenses we had no choice, only survival. Now we have true choice and abundantly so. We have choice beyond our wildest expectations. How do we get to that level of choosing?

Years ago, when writers and artists came to this point in their journey they referred to this emerging referent as "that still small voice within." Such voices are hard to hear amid the cacophony of our busy existences. But we can hear this voice now that we are out from under the tyranny of our defenses. This voice can be heard, or "felt," by tuning in to it, learning to listen for its subtle nuances as these can be distinguished from our ordinary inner chatter. This is the undercurrent to our conscious outer directed lives. We will get more insights now, more creative "thoughts," more intuitive glimpses about who we are and what direction we will want to pursue. These will feel strange at first, but oddly personal. We will know they are meant exclusively for us.

Some of us will hear this Voice loud and clear and create great works of art and engineering as a result. Others will receive subtler messages, but pressing all the same, and these will lead them on their path of conscious evolution. By choosing to listen to ourselves we will be acting appropriately for who we are and why we came to participate in this unfolding drama.

Heaven has no other purpose for us than to see us recreate it right here on Earth. Oh not the heaven of our illusions and childhood dreams, but a real utopia, one that sees people maximize their potential in an ever expanding interrelationship with each other. The old glue of Love will bind us together once again. We will be well informed and well served by listening to each other more closely. We will receive messages from each other and know they are valid because they reverberate with our hearts. This will be God talking to God, and listening to God, as us. How can we fail? We can't!

We will know what is accurate for us because our still small Voice will ratify incoming data as exclusively ours. Then we will move forward in the new direction. Trusting the Voice, or inner Pulse, and all of its possible configurations will allow this to happen. Remember, we are no longer circumscribed by our old defenses. We can move forward again and trust the information we are receiving is truly ours. It is hard, if not impossible, to fool a person who is well grounded in their own reality and in touch with their essential Self. This particular aspect of our heartfelt experience is what makes the whole process of moving forward so stable.
God had this in mind originally when He first created this scene and sent us here on this mission. He didn't anticipate that the wide detour we just came out of would have so readily distracted us from our ultimate purpose. But he saw to it that we obtained what we needed once we were taken off the main path. He sent us help several times, in the hands of women and men across the centuries and "these emissaries," these "Keepers of the Truth" helped us get back on track. So now we're at this new threshold, contemplating our next horizon, ready to engage this new gear called the "Self." This central driving force is what connects us directly to Him and takes us forward on our new adventure. How's that for mythology in action?

Here we are now, advancing His causes as has always been the plan, only this time consciously so. We are back on track. Where do we go from here?

A hero / heroine always enters into a path of service based on the traumas and challenges they have just overcome. If that is a path of healing, then healing others is what it will be. If that is a path of teaching, then teaching others will be the mainstay at this juncture of their lives. All heroes and heroines pass through their own trials first. They must overcome their demons, losses and heartache before instructing others on how to do the same. We, who are moving forward now, have inscribed these tenets in our healing journey already. We have taken up the reigns of helping heal others once our own had been accomplished. We are prepared to teach the upcoming generation those skills which have been so hard won. We must pass on what we have learned.

As the healers among us propagate their truth and assist others in their own unfolding, then more healers will be available to fill the gaps left by those who are moving forward. When any potential healer has finished with their grieving they are ready to enter the fold and choose their path of service. We cannot heal others while we are in mourning. We can only heal ourselves at this point. But once that is completed we can become a helper and healer if that's what our new horizon points to. It is only at this point that our path of service can come into view.

Then together, all of us, healers and teachers, will march in unison and inform the next group who are still lost in grief what is involved in their turn at the wheel, and what they need to accomplish to move past it. At some point wee will leave these tasks to the next graduating group of healers and teachers and we will become healers of a different sort. Right now we pass on what we've just learned and share every nuance with those coming behind us. The great cycle of life is at work once again.

All healers have been mourners at one time in their lives. Many mourners may become healers if that's what they choose. We will step into and out of such roles several times before we are done with them. Only then shall we seek a new order of being to take up once again our central purpose of learning. Growing and learning is what we are all here to do. Growing is what God wants for us. He has made this available to everyone. Our existences are marked by these precepts and we live and breathe them with each day of our presence on this planet.

We will revue all this later when we begin our next chapter. For now, suffice it to say that the new threshold is upon us. We are geared up and poised to take it on. Our healing journey will have given us the tools to take the next step. Our particular brand of healing will have prepared us for what our purpose is about. Once healed, we can activate that purpose. And that is what we are here to do.

Contents: Conscious Evolution ~ A Lightworker's Guide to Personal Growth
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