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I fell in love with a girl 12 years ago and she dumped me. She still lives in my mind and I could not forget her and therefore it is painful. I need guidance to overcome this.

In living it is always best to create your life out of the possibilities of the future rather than the disappointments of the past. You have idealized that relationship that finished 12 years ago. In your mind it has grown into a fantasy - an illusion of romantic bliss. Relationships are not things we engage in as fantasy. They are entered into with real people in the real world, with all the challenges that brings.

You need to see fantasy as fantasy and admit it is not a real thing, every time it arises in your mind. Then take the energy you were using to maintain that fantasy and use it to find a real relationship in the real world by taking action straight away to create fresh opportunities to meet and date new women.

Would you not rather have a real woman instead of an illusion?

Further Help and Resources
See the article by Linda Reeves, Is Your Baggage Holding You Back?.

Further Questions...

Question categories... Coach Yourself to Success A. HEALING YOURSELF B. BEING SUCCESSFUL C. LOVING RELATIONSHIPS D. UNDERSTANDING PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTIONS

HEALING YOURSELF... Letting go of anger and frustration Healing and helping yourself Finding your healing path Going beyond fear and anxiety Going beyond addictive behavior Understanding your sexual feelings and inclinations Coping with and learning from a major loss in your life Understanding psychic experiences

BEING SUCCESSFUL... Being true to yourself Achieving success Expressing yourself creatively Finding your life's purpose Learning to study well and present yourself skillfully Finding fulfillment through work Becoming master of your finances Becoming a successful life coach, counselor or healer

LOVING RELATIONSHIPS... Having successful relationships with parents and siblings Having successful relationships with friends Choosing the right dating partner and having a successful date Having a successful romantic relationship Succeeding at relationships with differing spiritual levels Creating a marriage full of love and understanding Problems with sex and infidelity within marriage Relationship with your divorced husband or wife Nurturing your children

UNDERSTANDING PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTIONS... What is the purpose of life? What is the best way to determine one's core values? What is love and a soul mate? Understanding death