Trans4mind Home Page
~ Making the Human Heart Visible ~

Looking for a better life?

Our online, interactive video workshops present the most effective methods of personal development, combined with personal support from expert life coaches.

Explore Article Library

Who is pushing your buttons?

How many times this week only, you had an encounter with someone who either pushed your buttons or you simply didn't like, meaning, the chemistry wasn't there?

It happens often. We hate the guts of this or that person, or we think that there is something wrong with them. Somehow we become absolutely critical and thus create an inaccurate and biased image of someone and nothing that person does is quite all right.

Of my many cases, there is one that I like to talk about. I was taking a course and we met 3 times a year for 5 years. Now, that is time enough to get know people. So, there was this woman, who was pleasant enough and very friendly and smiley, but as soon as she opened her mouth, I would roll my eyes and think: oh, boy, here she comes. Can't she just shut up? For 4 years I did that, until I realized something.

This thing is: "we cannot find in others what we ourselves do not possess." In other words: everything that we claim to find in people is something that we also have, or we wouldn't be able to recognize it, be it positive or negative.

So, do you find a person friendly? So are you. Do you find a person arrogant? So are you. Is this person competent? Funny? Giving? So are you. Is this person authoritarian, stubborn, prejudicial? So are you.

I know that you might be snapping at me at this point, but trust me; this is absolutely true. What we don't like in others in usually a reflection of our own qualities. Based on this, it is imperative that you take action when you meet someone who, one way or another pushes your buttons. Then you ask yourself one or more of the following questions:

1. What does this person have that I, too, have, but somehow I am denying it in myself?

2. What does this person have that I never knew I had it as well until now and I now that I know, I don't like it?

3. In what sense is this person just like me?

4. What characteristics do I have that I don't like and that I see reflected in this person?

5. What am I reflecting or projecting?

Try to find what bothers you and seek in yourself where the same quality is. It will help you tremendously. Coming back to my story; that woman in my course was French-Canadian. She spoke English with an accent, as she is foreigner. So do I. We then became the best of friends.

About the author:

Dr. Maria Moratto holds 5 degrees and is a life coach/educator. She promotes courses and seminars in attracting abundance and loving relationships, goal setting, diversity, time and stress management, career delineation, values clarification, leisure, college life, self-improvement, communication and learning styles, spirituality, health and lifestyle. Visit her website at up for a free e-zine.


Careers & Employment
Grief & Loss
Kids & Teens
Public Speaking
Self Help
Self Improvement & Motivation
Sexual Relations
Stress Management
Travel and Leisure

From our extensive site, you'll find good info on many topics using this search:

A great way to support your Trans4mind Training is to use these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

  • The Next Level ~ Designed to radically boost your performance in any field. It's based on a technique used by top athletes and other successful people to help them make a big stride forward.
  • Create Your Own Reality ~ Use the power of your unconscious mind to transform your life.
  • Deeper Self Respect ~ Use hypnosis to connect with your true inner worth.
  • Detach From Fear ~ Tune out nervousness and anxiety with hypnosis.
  • Generalized Anxiety Treatment ~ Use hypnosis as a generalized anxiety disorder treatment and you can feel calm today.
  • Improving Concentration and Focus ~ Learn how to discipline, direct and command your mind to improve your performance.
  • Exercise Motivation ~ Give you powerful keys to getting back on track with your exercise - and staying there.
  • Overcoming Shyness ~ Provides an invisible security blanket allowing you to develop social ease and overcome shyness.
  • Quick Confidence Booster ~ An audio hypnosis session that's specifically designed to get you (quickly!) back on track.
  • Stop Negative Thoughts ~ Learn powerful hypnotic techniques to stop negative thoughts before they start.
  • Overcoming Procrastination ~ Let hypnosis help you get on with what you need to do, when you need to do it. Let nothing hold you back.
  • Think Thin ~ Use hypnosis to re-train your brain and lose weight naturally... that's how to get and stay slim.
  • Fall Asleep Fast ~ Relearn how to fall asleep fast and enjoy a good night's sleep.
Search on an issue that interests or concerns you...

Trans4mind Training is the best thing we've ever done! It's a series of interactive video workshops covering the key challenges we all face in life - to help you achieve greater inner peace and true fulfillment.
Copyright © 1997-2016 Trans4mind Ltd