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Overcome Adultery: Ways to Make Your Marriage Whole Again

Unfortunately, cheating in marriage is becoming common place. While the stats for infidelity are not concrete, many couples therapists estimate close to 30 to 40 percent of wives and nearly 50 percent of husbands cheat on their partners. ( Now websites and select greeting card companies promote the idea and make money off of it. They encourage people to loose hope and to give up without thinking twice about their reasons for marrying in the first place.

Personally, I'm tired of seeing couples end their marriages, or put them in jeopardy, when they can find ways to be happy in their relationships. Whether or not you have experienced the jealousy, pain, embarrassment and frustration of an affair outside of your relationship, you can work towards healing your marriage. I have addressed strategies to help you keep you and your spouse together with an acrostic. The advice listed here takes more that what any individual has in and of himself or herself. If you know that both of you are willing to work at saving your marriage, read on. Then print it out, and keep it in a place to help you remember your plans for a happy marriage.

1. Find forgiveness in your heart, mind and soul
2. Accept that your relationship won't be the same
3. Insist that it will get better, though
4. Then take steps to get help
5. Hiring a Relationship Coach or Counselor is a good idea

6. Have faith in God's plan for you, your spouse and your marriage
7. Overcome the guilt, shame, blame and lame thinking
8. Pray that you and your partner can release bitterness, avoid temptation, and find healing
9. Expect a rough time ahead, but work towards a better relationship anyway

10. Lift your heads knowing that adultery doesn't have to rob you of a healthy marriage
11. Offer support to each other even if you don't feel like doing it
12. Voice your hurt, pain, past and future expectations with each other
13. Enjoy the power of unfailing, immovable, unconditional love by recognizing it each day

About the Author

Keishia Lee-Louis is the Executive Editor of (November 2005). Her work has appeared on,, and in many other publications. Currently, she's writing a book on marriage, which will be published in 2006. If you'd like to see more of her work, visit


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