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How Clutter Affects Your Love Life

Clutter in any area of your home is a sign of stuck, stagnant energy. The more clutter you have, the more sluggish the energy becomes. When the areas of your home associated with romance are cluttered and untidy, your love life is affected as well. From a feng shui perspective, the three places in your home that have the strongest impact on your love life are your bedroom, the Relationship Area (I'll tell you how to find that in a moment), and the space around your front door. Here's why:

Clutter in the Bedroom

Your bedroom is strongly associated with the intimacy of a romantic relationship. Clutter in the bedroom can contribute to fatigue, irritability, lack of focus, and difficulty sleeping. When you and your partner are tired, cranky, and distracted much of the time, your relationship is probably not getting the quality attention it needs and deserves. If you are single, a cluttered bedroom will make it more difficult for a new relationship to get started; all that stuck energy literally makes it hard for you to meet someone new. And that's before a potential partner gets a good look at the mess you are living in! Decluttering your bedroom is an excellent way to shake all that stuck energy loose and make room for a new relationship.

Clutter in the Relationship Area

The feng shui "ba gua" is a map of the energetic influences of a space. Some people use the ba gua according to the compass directions; with this method, the Relationship Area is the southwest sector of your home or of a specific room. Western feng shui orients the ba gua to the entry to a space; with this method, the Relationship area is the back right corner of the home or of a room. Instead of wondering which method to use, why not check out them both? Look around the SW sector of your home, and in the SW part of your bedroom. Now check the room(s) in the right-rear corner of the house, and look at the far right corner of your bedroom. Like a wet blanket thrown over a fire, clutter in any of these areas can smother the passion and intensity in your romance. You aren't much fun to be around when you feel depressed, indecisive, ineffective, creatively blocked, overly emotional, or too lethargic to care 'which is how you are likely to feel about your love life if your Relationship areas are filled with clutter! Find these areas within your home and bedroom, and make them your top priority for clutter-clearing attention.

Clutter Around the Front Door

The third major factor is the area around your front door. The main entrance is called "the Mouth of Chi" in feng shui, because it has the strongest influence on how chi (energy) flows into your home. You can't nourish your body without opening your mouth to eat. Similarly, your home can't benefit from fresh, vital chi if the front door is blocked with clutter or rarely used. Go take a look at your front door. Does it open all the way, or have you stored things behind it? Is your foyer or front hall clean and welcoming, or is it filled with stuff you haven't gotten around to putting away or getting rid of? When was the last time you used your front door?

The front door is associated with opportunities. If you've been trying to meet someone new without success, getting rid of clutter around the front door and using that entry more often are a good way to shift that stuck energy. You may find that opportunities to connect with someone new come to your attention more often, and that you are more likely to take advantage of them instead of feeling so tired you'd rather stay home. If you are in a relationship, a cluttered front entry can contribute to feelings of boredom and being stuck in a rut with each other. Opening the front door more widely and frequently is a good way to breathe new life into a less-than-exciting romantic connection.

When you have cleared the clutter from important areas of your home, you should see a shift for the better in your love life. For those who are single and looking for love, making space in your home literally creates space for a new relationship to come in. That new partner may manifest for you right away, or it may take time for the energy shifts to result in a new connection. Either way, the space you create by getting rid of clutter will help to lift your spirits, improve your mood, and increase your energy -- which will make you more enjoyable and attractive to everyone you meet, old friends and new.

If you are in a partnership that has not been going well, clutter-clearing alone is unlikely to solve all of your relationship problems. However, by clearing out key spaces you create mental and emotional space for greater clarity about the issues and behavior patterns that contribute to difficulties in your marriage or partnership. With greater clarity comes a greater capacity for wise decisions and appropriate action. You may even find that releasing clutter results in releasing a foundering relationship as well. Accept that it's all for the best, and focus on the new space you have created 'in your heart as well as in your home 'for a new and better love to come along.

(c) copyright 2005 Stephanie Roberts. Stephanie Roberts is the author of the "Clutter-Free Forever!" Home Coaching Program and the "Fast Feng Shui" book series. She invites you to visit her websites at and


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