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Counterpoint - The Personal Development Article Library


Healing Relationships: a Gift

By BJ Harris

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A deep committed relationship can provide a means for self-discovery, integration of limitations and a greater understanding of the world within each of us. This is a gift beyond measure when we open up to such a relationship. Our connection with our partner becomes a wonderful adventure for both parties, and the possibilities for growth together are infinite.

The premise for such a relationship is knowledge that everything on the inside is reflected back to us on the outside. Our partners are perfect mirrors to the hidden belief systems, associated emotions, habitual behaviors and everything we have secretly hidden away. These "secrets" are often times hidden so deep, that we are not aware of their existence. Secrets that may be too painful to remember or bring out in the open. As we see ourselves reflected back by our partner, we have a choice to look within and commit to letting go of all our belief in lack, all our pain from past experiences and all our hidden secrets. This is our opportunity for real change and freedom.

It is important to remember that a deep relationship, built on truth and trust is not about trying to change the other person. We all have habits, beliefs, emotions and reactions that no longer serve our lives and our growth. With a deep compassion and love for our partners, as they mirror back to us the ways in which we can "let go", a bond is formed, a new understanding of their love is felt, a connection is made on the level of the subconscious mind.

When we are experiencing this type of relationship, we have an inner knowing that, "this is for me." We have a greater understanding and trust for the process and out of that we are able to commit to our partner, honoring who they are and even respecting what they are mirroring back to us, knowing that it is a gift just for us.

These types of relationships focus on growth and healing core issues in an atmosphere of love and trust. There is no blame, simply a deep commitment for communication, resolution of conflict and how it applies to any hidden agenda surfacing to be healed.

As we commit to this wonderfully fulfilling relationship of love and mutual support, it is necessary to realize that this is a healing process, which takes time. It is not a magic fix, but a continual process that will reveal anything that keeps us in limitations. It is not our birthright to live limiting our greatness, our freedom and our joy. A truth-truth relationship is to be cherished and nurtured with honesty, integrity and non-judgment. This gives each partner the opportunity to express openly without fear of rejection, allowing each other the time to integrate and let go and even laugh at the situation.

There is no set "art" to experiencing a deeper relationship - each one is of it's own creation, as two share in growth and healing through acceptance, communication, love and commitment. There is nothing more satisfying than knowing another is there to further your growth and you are there to reciprocate.

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Daring to be Yourself
Daring to be Yourself The aim of the new book, Daring to be Yourself by Peter Shepherd, is to help you achieve a 'wide-awake' state of consciousness, with integrated use of left and right brain abilities, forming the bedrock for breakthroughs in personal consciousness and spiritual insight. The practice is based on the premise that we have learned disabilities that set boundaries to our action and knowing. But no one need accept that they must remain as they were shaped by their hereditary body-mind and by the conditioning of their childhood and culture.
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